Kerry Gordon PhD, RP, Clinical Member OSP
"In the end what matters most is
How well did you live
How well did you love
How well did you learn to let go."
A client recently came to see me. He was a 42 year old consultant who was clearly in crisis. His mother had recently died; his wife had left him and a major business contract that he was counting on had fallen through. Everything seemed to be unravelling. He was feeling anxious, depressed and quite hopeless. After telling me his story he looked up and asked, "Does this ever happen to anyone else?"
At some point in our lives we will all meet with crisis. I don't mean the minor frustrations that are a part of our everyday life but rather experiences and events that, in their unexpected intensity, shake us to the very core. We might be going through the breakup of a marriage or intimate relationship, the loss of a loved one, a career derailed or simply waking up one morning depressed, anxious and frustrated, wondering, "Who am I and what am I doing with my life?" In any case, these are times that we need help to make sense of what often seems senseless and too painful to bear. As a psychotherapist I provide that help: By guiding my clients in transforming crisis into opportunity, I help them re-imagine their life and relationships in ways that bring them a sense of depth, connectedness and meaning.
The suffering we experience in crisis is not a disease; it is not something to be cured. Rather, it is our life speaking to us, calling on us to participate differently - more fully and authentically - in the world. And that means waking up and paying attention. After all, our success in the world depends not on who we ought to be or who we expect to be but on who we really are. Where we find ourselves in our life, for good or ill, is due to the choices we make. To the extent that we are unaware how we are making choices we tend to feel like a victim, subject to circumstances beyond our control. Crisis challenges us to pay attention to what we are feeling and what we are experiencing so that we can begin to make authentic choices and shape our life as the author rather than a mere character.
Whether working with individuals or couples, this is at the core of my approach to psychotherapy; that by seeing our suffering as an expression of our life as it actually is and by understanding that it is our beliefs and behaviours that trap us in our suffering, we awaken to choice. By exercising choice we begin to transform our beliefs and lo and behold our life and relationships transform as well.
This is not an easy path but working from within a therapeutic perspective that embraces compassion, respect and care it is possible to discover richness and depth in our life and relationships.
I have listed under my photo the areas I mostly work with as couples, depression, career issues and relationship. If you are struggling with relationship, career or personal issues that are making it difficult for you to experience the joy and passion that is there for you, please give me a call. A simple conversation on the telephone can mark the beginning of positive, healing change.
My office is located at Dufferin and St. Clair with easy access by TTC and free parking for those driving. Here's my map. Please feel free to contact me by e-mail for an initial consultation where we can meet and see if there is a good fit for continuing work.
I look forward to speaking with you.
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